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Work Negativity: 6 Tips for Turning Around Negativity at Work

 
Author: Carla Rieger
 

< P > C o n f l i c t i s l i k e w i n d ; t o o m u c h c a u s e s d e s t r u c t i o n ; t o o l i t t l e a n d n o t r a n s f o r m a t i o n c a n o c c u r . < / P > < P > A c l i e n t o f m i n e ( a m a n a g e r ) t o l d m e h e w a s h a v i n g a w o n d e r f u l d a y , a n d t h e n a m a n c a l l e d t o c o m p l a i n a b o u t o n e o f h i s e m p l o y e e s . T h e e x c h a n g e a f f e c t e d h i s e n t i r e d a y , h i s s l e e p t h a t n i g h t a n d h i s a b i l i t y t o c o n c e n t r a t e o n a n i m p o r t a n t p r o j e c t t h e n e x t d a y . H o w o f t e n d o y o u l e t a n e g a t i v e i n t e r a c t i o n r u i n y o u r p e a c e o f m i n d ? T h a t d o e s n ? t h a v e t o h a p p e n . B e l o w a r e 6 t i p s t h a t c a n h e l p y o u t u r n a r o u n d a n e g a t i v e i n t e r a c t i o n . < / P > < P > < B > 1 . ? W h a t h a s h a p p e n e d t h a t m a k e s y o u t h i n k _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ ? ? < / B > < / P > < P > C o m m u n i c a t i o n b r e a k d o w n s a r e c o m m o n i n e v e r y w o r k p l a c e . T h e r e a r e m a n y s t e p s y o u c a n t a k e t o e i t h e r p r e v e n t t h o s e b r e a k d o w n s o r t o m i t i g a t e t h e d a m a g e . E s c a l a t i o n u s u a l l y o c c u r s w h e n s o m e o n e j u m p s t o c o n c l u s i o n s . C h e c k o u t a s s u m p t i o n s b e f o r e y o u r e a c t b y a s k i n g a s i m p l e q u e s t i o n t h a t s t a r t s w i t h t h e s e w o r d s ? W h a t h a s h a p p e n e d t h a t m a k e s y o u t h i n k _ _ _ _ _ ? ? o r ? W h a t m a k e s y o u s a y _ _ _ _ ? ? Y o u w i l l b e a m a z e d a t h o w q u i c k l y y o u c a n d i f f u s e t h e s i t u a t i o n b y g e t t i n g c l e a r o n t h e f a c t s . < / P > < P > F o r e x a m p l e : < / P > < P > C u s t o m e r : ? Y o u p e o p l e h e r e a r e s o u n p r o f e s s i o n a l ! ? < / P > < P > R e s p o n s e ( i n a c a l m , r e s p e c t f u l & a m p ; c u r i o u s t o n e ) : ? W h a t h a s h a p p e n e d t h a t m a k e s y o u t h i n k w e a r e u n p r o f e s s i o n a l ? ? < / P > < P > C u s t o m e r : ? Y o u f i l l e d o u t t h i s f o r m i n c o r r e c t l y a n d n o w I ? m g o i n g t o l o s e m y c r e d i t r a t i n g ! ? < / P > < P > R e s p o n s e : ? I c a n s e e w h y y o u ? d b e u p s e t . I c a n a s s u r e y o u t h a t t h i s e r r o r w i l l b e c o r r e c t e d i m m e d i a t e l y a n d i t w i l l n o t a f f e c t y o u r c r e d i t r a t i n g . J u s t f o r f u t u r e r e f e r e n c e , i t i s n o t o u r d e p a r t m e n t w h o c r e a t e s t h e s e f o r m s , b u t w e a r e h a p p y t o h e l p y o u s o r t i t o u t h e r e . ? < / P > < P > < B > 2 . C a l l a ? T i m e O u t ? < / B > < / P > < P > I f y o u r B a c k B r a i n ( o r f i g h t o r f l i g h t r e s p o n s e ) g e t s t r i g g e r e d b y a n e g a t i v e i n t e r a c t i o n y o u k n o w y o u a r e f e e l i n g e i t h e r a f r a i d o r a n g r y . O n c e t r i g g e r e d - - y o u r q u a l i t y o f j u d g m e n t , c o m m u n i c a t i o n s k i l l s , a n d y o u r a b i l i t y t o s e e s o l u t i o n s - - a l l d e c r e a s e . Y o u r p h y s i o l o g y p r e p a r e s t o a t t a c k o r r u n a w a y . A d r e n a l i n e p u m p s i n t o t h e b l o o d s t r e a m , h e a r t r a t e i n c r e a s e s , b l o o d p r e s s u r e g o e s u p , m u s c l e s t e n s e , v o i c e c h a n g e s p i t c h , p u p i l s e n l a r g e , e t c . I t i s o n l y w h e n y o u r p h y s i o l o g y r e t u r n s t o n o r m a l t h a t y o u c a n h a v e a c o n s t r u c t i v e c o n v e r s a t i o n . T r y t a k i n g a w a l k d o w n t h e h a l l a n d d o s o m e l o n g s l o w b r e a t h s , o r s i m p l e c o u n t t o t e n b e f o r e a n s w e r i n g . < / P > < P > < B > 3 . V e n t y o u r n e g a t i v e f e e l i n g s i n a c o n s t r u c t i v e w a y < / B > < / P > < P > I f t e c h n i q u e # 2 d o e s n ? t w o r k , t a k e a l o n g e r b r e a k . C a l m l y a n d r e s p e c t f u l l y r e - s c h e d u l e a d i s c u s s i o n l a t e r i n t h e d a y a f t e r y o u ? v e h a d t i m e t o r e f l e c t . G o f o r a v i g o r o u s w a l k o r r u n , w r i t e o u t y o u r t h o u g h t s , o r t a l k i t o u t w i t h a n o b j e c t i v e t h i r d p a r t y , e t c . O n c e y o u d i f f u s e t h e n e g a t i v i t y y o u w i l l b e a b l e t o s e e w i n - w i n s o l u t i o n s t h a t w e r e n o t a p p a r e n t b e f o r e . < / P > < P > < B > 4 . S t a t e a c o l l a b o r a t i v e i n t e n t < / B > < / P > < P > O n c e b a c k i n t h e c o n v e r s a t i o n , s t a r t t h e c o n v e r s a t i o n w i t h s u c h p h r a s e s a s : ? I w o u l d l i k e t o f i n d a n o u t c o m e t h a t w o r k s f o r b o t h o f u s , ( o r f o r a l l p a r t i e s c o n c e r n e d ) . ? < / P > < P > ? M y i n t e n t i s t o f i g u r e o u t a w a y t h a t a l l o w s e v e r y o n e t o f e e l s a t i s f i e d w i t h t h e r e s u l t s . ? < / P > < P > < B > 5 . R e f r a m e i n t h e p o s i t i v e < / B > < / P > < P > S u m m a r i z e t h e o t h e r p e r s o n ? s c o m p l a i n t a n d t h e n r e - s t a t e i t i n p o s i t i v e t e r m s : < / P > < P > Y o u : ? Y o u s a y y o u f e e l t h a t t h e n e w s c h e d u l e i s u n f a i r b e c a u s e i t g e t s i n t h e w a y o f f a m i l y c o m m i t m e n t s . S o w h a t y o u a r e r e a l l y l o o k i n g f o r i s a s c h e d u l e t h a t w o r k s f o r y o u r j o b a s w e l l a s f o r y o u r f a m i l y . I s t h a t c o r r e c t ? ? < / P > < P > E m p l o y e e : Y e s , t h e s c h e d u l e b e f o r e l e t m e p i c k m y k i d s u p f r o m s c h o o l , n o w t h e y h a v e t o t a k e t h e b u s . C h e r y l n o w h a s m y o l d s c h e d u l e a n d s h e d o e s n ? t h a v e k i d s . ? < / P > < P > Y o u : M y i n t e n t i s t o f i n d s o m e t h i n g t h a t w o r k s f o r e v e r y o n e . I w a n t y o u t o m e e t y o u r f a m i l y c o m m i t m e n t s a n d f o r u s t o m e e t o u r o b l i g a t i o n s t o o u r c u s t o m e r s . Y o u r p r e s e n c e i n t h e l a t e a f t e r n o o n i s i m p o r t a n t t o t h e c o m p a n y . L e t ? s p u t o u r h e a d s t o g e t h e r a n d I ? m s u r e w e c a n f i n d a w o r k a b l e s o l u t i o n . ? < / P > < P > < B > 6 . T h i n k o u t s i d e t h e b o x < / B > < / P > < P > O n c e y o u h a v e c l e a r e d u p a s s u m p t i o n s , v e n t e d n e g a t i v i t y i n a c o n s t r u c t i v e w a y , s t a t e d a c o l l a b o r a t i v e i n t e n t , r e f r a m e d b o t h y o u r n e e d s i n a p o s i t i v e w a y , y o u w i l l s t a r t t o s e e p o s s i b i l i t i e s . T a k e a f e w m i n u t e s t o s i m p l y b r a i n s t o r m o n a n u m b e r o f p o s s i b l e s o l u t i o n s w i t h o u t e d i t i n g . T h e n o n c e y o u r l i s t i s i n p l a c e , y o u c a n b o t h c h o o s e t h e o n e ( s ) t h a t w o u l d b e s t s e r v e t h e n e e d s o f a l l t h o s e c o n c e r n e d . < / P >

 
 
 

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